Narcissists are like sunflowers, constantly turning toward the sun to soak up light and warmth. For them, the “sun” is the adoration and energy they extract from those around them. This adoration validates their bloated sense of self-worth and feeds their narrative of being unparalleled. But when the sun sets, it feels like an endless, chilling night. The absence of this adoration leaves them craving and empty.
Recently, my narcissistic mother said, “What happened to the son who couldn’t stand the thought of living without me for a second?” I loved her more than my own life, but that was my separation anxiety and my trauma bond with her. Her asking me that question revealed her emotional world. Me separating from her was an earth-shattering change for her. Narcissists scramble to find a replacement for the energy you provided, but it’s like chasing a mirage. They yearn to quench their thirst, but nothing satisfies them the same way. They may stalk or grill mutual friends for information, trying to replicate the relationship with someone new but always falling short.
4. Not understanding why you didn’t see how great they are
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