If you ever want to test who someone truly is, fall into a crisis. I promise you, if they’re a narcissist, they will vanish faster than you can blink. Emergencies do not activate their love; they activate their exit strategy. Narcissists cannot stand being burdened. The moment the spotlight shifts from their needs to yours, you become disposable.
Whether it’s financial struggles, health scares, emotional breakdowns, or trauma, you will find yourself completely alone—and not only alone but also blamed. I know a survivor who had to take herself to every chemotherapy session while her husband, her supposed partner, was too busy flirting with women half his age. When she asked for help, he called her dramatic.
My own experience mirrored this. When I was in college and was falsely diagnosed with two kidney stones, I had to make urgent arrangements to travel. It was really painful, and I was deeply scared. Naturally, I reached out to my family, specifically my father. His response shocked me. He exploded into a fit over the cost of the flight ticket. Not once did he ask if I was okay; not once did he check if I had someone with me. It was all about money. To him, I should have managed on my own, as if I was asking for a luxury rather than urgent medical help. That wasn’t a father’s reaction; that was a cold, calculating businessman trying to minimize his loss.
To narcissists, your suffering is inconvenient; your pain is an attack on their peace. And if they help you by any chance, they expect eternal praise. That is emotional abandonment, wrapped in ego, and it leaves a mark deeper than the original crisis ever could because the very person you thought would hold your hand when life broke you was already gone.
Behavior Number Five: Sacrificing Others for Comfort
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