The second habit is revenge bedtime procrastination. Survivors often stay up late, savoring the peace between 11 p.m. and 3 a.m. Free from the narcissist’s demands, accusations, and chaos, this time is pure freedom. Staying up is a small act of rebellion—a way of saying, “You control my day, but not my night.”
As a child, I would retreat to my room by 9 p.m., escaping into books and finding solace in my fantasy world. Those characters were real to me, offering a life I wished for in reality. That silence became precious, and now, noise triggers me. Revenge bedtime procrastination allows us to reflect on our identity and process what’s happening, and for some, it’s a small way to push back against the narcissist’s control. Do you find yourself savoring the night hours too? Share your thoughts in the comments.
Habit 3: Listening to the Same Songs for Validation
Many survivors also listen to the same songs repeatedly to validate their pain. Do you have a playlist for when you’re sad, or an artist you turn to? For me, it’s Adele. Her songs became my validation when no one else understood my experience. Listening to someone else narrate my pain made me feel less alone.
Those songs become emotional anchors, justifying our struggles and filling the gap left by the narcissist’s lack of empathy. They tell us we’re not alone and that what’s happening is unacceptable. Who’s your favorite artist, and what song do you have on repeat? Comment below!
Habit 4: Finding Comfort in Extra Hot Showers
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