Narcissists will deliberately withhold communication, like not replying to texts, emails, or phone messages in a reasonable period of time. Withholding communication also includes withholding the truth. Narcissists will withhold the truth, especially if they believe it helps them maintain a sense of power or that false sense of superiority. Remember, it’s all about power, domination, and control when you’re dealing with a narcissist. They will lie by omission, leaving out important details and great big huge chunks of the story—particularly the stuff that wouldn’t cast them in a very favorable light. Anything to make them look like the victim, the hero, the good guy or girl, and of course, you the villain.
Money and Other Important Resources
Narcissists will deliberately withhold money and other important resources. In my view and experience, financial sovereignty and independence are vital, always. But when dealing with people who land on the spectrum of destructive narcissism, there are no words to describe how vitally important this one is. Narcissists will hold you hostage given the chance, so you never ever want to give them that kind of power over you. Never ever allow yourself to become financially dependent on someone who does not have your best interest at heart—someone who feels entitled to hurt you and blame you for the hurt they cause. Friends, if you hear nothing else, hear this: never, ever, ever borrow money, lean on, depend on, go to for help, or in any way become dependent upon someone with a destructive narcissist personality pattern. You will live to regret it, I assure you. Here’s what’s true: an often overlooked and underestimated part of personal empowerment is financial empowerment. Nobody wants to talk about it, but when you give that power over to a destructive narcissist, they will hold you hostage and enjoy watching you suffer in the process. Financial abuse, isolating you from friends and family, sabotaging your relationships with others, or otherwise attempting to orchestrate a smear campaign are various ways that narcissists withhold resources from you. Whether those resources are monetary, social, or emotional, malignant narcissists know that in order to create a sense of dependency in their target, they must isolate the target from outside influence and support—support and influence which would otherwise enable the target to exit and move on from the abuse cycle with more ease, confidence, and certainty. Isolating you from your support network allows the narcissist to become the dominant voice in your life, which can alter your reality and the perception you have of yourself as they gaslight, belittle, and slowly but surely dismantle your sense of self. Smear campaigns in which they try to slander you and taint your reputation, whether that be at work, within the family, or shared social circles, allow the narcissist to feed others misinformation about you so that you look like the abuser while they play the victim. Taking complete control over your shared finances gives them the means to keep you trapped and unable to leave the relationship, no matter how cruel they become.
Sharing is caring!
