Accountability is like poison to a narcissist. Why? Because it reveals the truth, and truth annihilates them. They cannot stand it when you try to stay on topic or ask direct questions that force them to admit they were wrong. Instead of answering, they prefer to beat around the bush, leading you through circular conversations until you are too tired to continue. “I’m going to bed; I’m dead tired,” you’ll say. They hate your guts when you repeat their own words back to them because they can’t handle a taste of their own medicine. Instead, they project the blame onto you, making everything your fault.
Number Three: When you enjoy your life without them.
They believe they should control your emotional state. If you experience joy or any positive emotions without them, they feel abandoned. You are individuating and separating from them, which to them means losing control. Let’s say it’s your birthday, and you’re having fun with friends. The narcissist will sulk, make faces, or act like a victim. You’re ignoring them because you’ve had enough. That’s when they hate you the most because they can’t stand your indifference. Out of envy, they will try to destroy your happiness however they can.
Number Four: They hate your genuine connections with family and friends.
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