Grading
Along the same lines, many female covert narcissists will start grading your performance. For example, she might say you are only a six out of ten last night or that vacation was only 40 percent of what I was expecting. And she will show this chronic dissatisfaction with the amount of affection or compliments you give, how much money you spent—whatever effort you put in. And she will be nitpicking at you, criticizing and putting you and your efforts down, again no matter how hard you try.
The covert narcissist will have a lot of boundaries that go one way. Any boundaries or rules that you have will be disregarded, and if you need or want anything, it’s unimportant or stupid. The double standards when it comes to any type of boundaries are absolutely ridiculous.
Control
She needs to know and control everything you do—when you go, do groceries, when you go to the gym, when you talk to someone. She accuses you of this, that, and the other. This is not always due to jealousy but often it’s just to do with controlling you. She questions not only what you do but how you do it, as though you can’t do anything right.
How The Narcissist Views Your Silence
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