The second reason narcissists target younger partners is their parasitic need to live vicariously through others. As they age, they lose their physical charm, strength, and ability to maintain the illusion of grandeur. Having a younger partner serves two purposes: it boosts their image and helps them self-delude into believing they’re still youthful.
Being with someone younger allows them to carry out a bizarre form of gaslighting, convincing themselves they’re still young because someone from a younger generation is romantically interested in them. This dynamic reinforces their denial of aging and bolsters their ego.
Triangulation and Insecurity
An aging narcissist may also use younger partners to manipulate others, particularly their spouse or peers. For instance, a male narcissist might simultaneously date a younger woman while being married. This triangulation makes the spouse feel undesirable and fosters insecurity. He might say things like, “This young girl is crazy about me; she’s energetic and vibrant. You, on the other hand, are boring and unattractive.” This tactic not only destabilizes the spouse but also inflates the narcissist’s ego.
The Endgame
Ultimately, narcissists chase younger partners to maintain their illusion of power, influence, and desirability. They fear becoming weak and irrelevant, so they seek validation through younger “supply” to reinforce their image. A wealthy narcissist, for example, might flaunt a young partner as proof of their vitality, ensuring they’re perceived as strong and capable rather than pitiful or frail.
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