But here’s the truth: when love is real, it shows up before the goodbye, not after. That’s not love; it’s bait. You have to ask yourself: are they turning from their ways or just turning up the charm to pull you back in? Real change—you’ll know it by the weight it carries. It faces the mess, it takes time, even years, and it submits to wise counsel that sees through the charm and calls out the mask. Without that, you’re just watching a rare run with fancier packaging.
Then comes the reinvention, but it’s just a costume change. Ever seen someone repaint a house that’s crumbling underneath? That’s what the narcissist does next. They put on a new face, a new job, a new testimony. They mimic who you wanted them to be. But listen, don’t let surface sparkle fool you. That’s makeup over scars they never healed. That’s light with no heat. They want you to believe the show means substance, but the heart hasn’t even been touched.
Then they try to pull you back with smoke and whispers. It’s called hoovering, and it’s exactly what it sounds like: a slow, deliberate sucking of your peace, your time, your energy. They’ll show up in places they swore they’d avoid, message you when you’ve made it clear you want no contact, create drama, and fake emergencies. They might even loop in mutual friends just to open a crack in your boundary wall. Why? Because silence feels like death to a narcissist, and your freedom terrifies them—not because they miss you, but because they can’t use you.
Next, the twisting begins. They write the story. Get ready for the gaslight gospel. Suddenly, you’re the problem, you’re the unstable one, you’re the reason they’re hurting. If you’ve got faith, they’ll weaponize it: “Is this really what God would want? Are you sure you’re not bitter? Aren’t you supposed to forgive?” My friend, don’t fall for the twisted scripture. The narcissist knows just enough about God to dress manipulation in Sunday clothes. But God is not the author of confusion. He does not call you to destroy your soul in the name of keeping someone else comfortable.
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