During the love-bombing phase, a narcissist, usually a grandiose narcissist, may depict themselves as your “Mr. or Mrs. Perfect” by using mirroring, future faking, spontaneous moments, an abundance of gifts, and superficial intimacy.
The love bombing phase is a particularly deceptive period that not everyone who has experienced narcissistic abuse goes through, but for those who have, it feels beautiful.
The love bombing phase is hard because it manipulates your desire to be wanted, which creates an almost impenetrable trauma bond that keeps the victim trapped in the relationship eternally.
How?
The love bombing phase does not persist indefinitely; the narcissist will eventually abandon the act and begin to devalue, manipulate, and emotionally/physically assault you.
The difficulty is that because the love bombing phase is so intense, victims of narcissistic abuse often justify, rationalize, and normalize the abuse they are subjected to in the hopes that the narcissist would one day return to who they were during the love bombing phase.
Narcissists lack the sincerity, emotional stability, vulnerability, and honesty required for true levels of genuine intimacy. Relationships are solely transactional for narcissists, in other words.
Love Bombing Examples
- I believe we should marry! (After only a few months of dating)
- You are everything I have ever desired!
- We’re identical twins!
- You’ve saved my life; I’m not sure what I’d do without you!
- I adore you. (After only a few weeks of dating)
Using Your Vulnerabilities, Insecurities, and Desires Against You Narcissists have an amazing capacity to quickly learn the ins and outs of your life. Mirroring is a narcissistic ability that opens the door to a variety of other manipulative techniques.
Because the narcissist is essentially absorbing all of your vulnerabilities, fears, and desires and reflecting them back to you, mirroring is a tremendously misleading approach.
It gives you the impression that you’ve met someone who knows everything there is to know about you. Mirroring is an important aspect of the love-bombing phase. It’s what makes people who’ve had the experience feel like they’ve met their soulmates.
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