Be Prepared
Remember, they’re looking to trigger an emotional reaction from you, right? So, be prepared to say things like, “fine, you’re entitled to think that”, “you’re entitled to see it that way”, “you’re entitled to feel that way”. When you do that, when you don’t engage and get sucked into the toxic vortex, they’re literally starved for their hit of narcissistic supply and it doesn’t take very long before they realize you’re not a good source of narcissistic supply.
So, in so much as you are able, like I said, detached, right, like, hang back, don’t get sucked in, hold onto yourself, and keep it in the “I” language if you have to communicate with these people, either the “I” language or the “we” language. It’s so easy when we’re engaged in, you know, the frustrating, nonsensical, mind-bending, crazy-making conversations with these folks to go into “you, you, you, you, you”, right? Like, they really inspire that in us, right, but that’s not helpful and it’s certainly not going to help you shut them down permanently. If you’re coming at them with “you, you, you”, no matter how right you may be, they’re going to feel attacked and backed into a corner. Everything will escalate and all of this will be much, much harder to do.
So, speak in the “I” language or if you must, the “we” language. Keep it there and learn to manage your own energy field. Learn to manage what’s going on with you. Don’t be sarcastic, stay calm and strong, grounded and clear, holding onto you, refusing to give your power away.
What happens when you stop paying attention to a narcissist
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