6. They’re Feeling Emotionally Exposed
According to Dr. Mark Ettenson, a psychologist who studies narcissism, narcissists often have a fragile sense of self, and moments that require emotional openness feel like a threat to their carefully constructed image. To protect themselves from feeling exposed or weak, they withdraw and become cold. It’s like they put on emotional armor, blocking any feelings that might reveal a deeper side to them. They’d rather keep their distance than risk being seen as anything less than perfect, especially when it involves emotions they’re not ready to confront.
7. You Didn’t Deserve This Moment in Their Eyes
Dr. Robin Stern explains in her book The Gaslight Effect that narcissists often believe their internal version of reality is the ultimate truth. If your achievement doesn’t align with what they think you’ve earned, they’ll ice you out. It’s their twisted way of showing disapproval—not with words, but with silence and distance. To them, your moment feels like injustice, especially if it shines brighter than theirs. Instead of clapping for you, they withdraw as if protesting. It makes you question if you even deserve your joy, which you absolutely do. Narcissists just can’t handle the spotlight not being on them. They’ll try to make you feel small by diminishing your success, even if it’s something they’d never admit they’re jealous of. Their silence is less about you and more about their inability to share the stage. Don’t let their coldness convince you that your victories aren’t valid, because they absolutely are.
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