Narcissists project their guilt, shame, and shortcomings onto you. In their twisted version of events, you are the one who hurt them, took advantage of them, and left them to pick up the pieces. They see you as everything they despise in themselves.
Here’s what is truly mind-boggling: they genuinely believe it. They don’t consider—even for a second—the possibility that they might be the abuser. They just “know” they are telling the truth.
The Narcissist’s Perspective on Your Departure
After enduring months or years of their spirit-crushing abuse, you finally find the strength to walk away. For you, this is a moment of reclaiming your life. But for them, it’s an act of betrayal.
In their mind, your departure isn’t about your survival or healing—it’s about their loss. They convince themselves of the following:
- “You abandoned me.”
- “You didn’t appreciate everything I did for you.”
- “You made me look like the bad guy.”
- “Now you get to live happily while I’m left in ruins.”
They feel justified in their anger and unleash their rage, acting like the victim of your “mistreatment” while ignoring the harm they caused you.
Rewriting History: The Narcissist’s Narrative
When Narcissists Lose Their Scapegoat
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