You believe people are as good-hearted as you are. You do not walk around suspecting everyone; you believe in people’s better nature. You assume honesty, decency, and kindness. In a world that is starving for goodness, your heart is rare. But the same belief system is what the narcissist exploited. You did not think someone could lie that well, manipulate that quietly, or hurt that consistently while smiling. This trait is not stupidity; it’s spiritual innocence, and that innocence is sacred. You just did not know it needed protection.
Trait 3: Avoiding Harm to Others
You hate hurting others, even when they are hurting you. You hold back your truth because you do not want to be cruel. You overthink how your words may land, worrying if someone will feel rejected or unloved by you. Unfortunately, this allows them to mistreat you a little longer. Your careful heart rarely erupts; it endures, justifies, and quietly suffers. This is not weakness; it is emotional refinement. You have evolved past reactive cruelty. You understand how deeply words can wound, and you choose silence over shame, compassion over conflict. Yet the narcissist twisted this against you, knowing you would rather self-destruct than destroy someone else.
Trait 4: Obsession with Self-Growth
You are obsessed with self-growth, which made you think you were the problem. Of course, there was gaslighting, but every time something went wrong, you looked inward. You asked, “What did I miss? What am I doing wrong here? How can I improve?” You did not attack; you analyzed. You read books, journaled, worked on your communication, and apologized even when you were the one who was hurt. This is emotional maturity, and it’s rare. But the narcissist saw it as an opening; they knew they did not have to change a thing while you would do all the work.
Trait 5: Confusing Endurance with Love
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