When a narcissistic parent has been tightly controlling their child’s life and the child gains independence, it is akin to dethroning royalty. The narcissist experiences existential turmoil. They have been orchestrating the show for so long that this sudden jolt leaves them flabbergasted and desperate. The scenario is even more pronounced when someone gains financial independence from a narcissist who uses money as a tool to control. Financial freedom is like breaking the chains that keep you bound to the narcissist. This takes me back to the time when I started earning, and my father reacted adversely. He even said, “You should be struggling right now, not going after money, not earning.” Back then, I could clearly see the fear of loss of control over me in his eyes. It was all about that. The narcissist senses the crumbling of their kingdom as they can no longer dictate terms or make demands. This loss of control is not something that the narcissist can easily digest. Furthermore, the narcissist thrives on the subservience of others. When someone asserts independence, they are essentially rejecting the narcissist’s perceived grandeur. This punctures the narcissist’s delusional idea of themselves. It’s as if their oxygen supply has been cut off, and they will frantically gasp and flail, trying to regain what they lost. The narcissist is haunted by this loss. The fact that someone is beyond their grasp, flourishing without them, and no longer a pawn in their game leaves a gaping void. How do I know this? This is what my narcissistic family is demonstrating right now.
- The adoration they can’t find anywhere else
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing is caring!
