For narcissists, these outside relationships are not about love or even attraction in the way healthy people understand it. They’re about supply, which can come in many forms—status, social connection, or simply the thrill of the chase. It’s not always about the opposite sex; male or female narcissists will pursue relationships with anyone who offers the type of supply they crave at that moment.
When you confront a narcissist about their cheating, you’re not just challenging their behavior; you’re challenging their entire worldview. The justification machine kicks into high gear. They will tell you that you’re being dramatic, sensational, or that you are overreacting. They will make you feel like you are going crazy for questioning what should be obvious betrayals.
The Emotional Absence of Narcissists
What makes this particularly devastating for you as their partner is that while the narcissist is physically present, they are emotionally absent. They may be sitting next to you on the couch, but they are mentally somewhere else entirely. This emotional absence creates a particularly cruel form of loneliness. You are living with someone who claims to love you but never seems to be fully present with you.
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