6 Ways a Narcissist Uses Sleep To Cheat On You
And number five: in the last one—this is different, but it’s a very common experience. Let me know if you’ve experienced this too.
They immediately fall asleep after an intense argument. And you’re left shattered, unsupported, wondering, “What the hell happened? What was that?” You’re shocked. Your core is taken aback. You’re struggling in the deafening silence—because what just happened feels unfathomable, incomprehensible, and unacceptable.
They fall asleep immediately because, during the argument, they regulated their own emotions by berating you, abusing you, and treating you the way they treated you during that argument.
You were their emotional regulator.
They projected the hatred, the venom, and the anger they have within themselves onto you. You became the recipient of all that heavy, negative energy. They unloaded and unburdened themselves—and now you’re carrying that.
On top of that, you’re carrying your own dysregulation—your own pain, your own sadness, your own shock. So it becomes really, really painful to bear it, because it’s heavy. And as a human being, you have limitations. You can only take so much and still carry everything successfully.
They use sleep to escape in the moment. Right away, they go to sleep. They don’t care if you’re crying or if you’re in pain. They won’t wake up to check if you’re okay. They won’t wake up to support you or to calm you down.
Of course not. The opposite. In a very cruel way, they ask you to be silent—and to cry in a lower tone—if you’re crying too loudly, because you’re not allowed to express your emotions. Your emotions are a nuisance. You’re a nuisance. You should keep them to yourself so you don’t bother them.
And if you do that, you have to be punished—you have to be pushed back. That’s what they do.
In a nutshell: they sleep in so many ways to escape accountability, escape the situation, escape connecting with you, cheat on you, betray you, and destroy you.
That is what they do. And that’s evil. If that isn’t evil, then I don’t know what is.
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